hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
