I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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