Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
