Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
im holly from the hills drunk
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
