he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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