Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I need to align my fucking chakras
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
