Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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