bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
