she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
