i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
