remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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