all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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