Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize
