Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
