so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
