I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
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