I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
