BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize