How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
