i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I pour the whiskey from now on
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
