feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
