I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
