Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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