Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
