I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I FOUND THE LEGS
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize