what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
