Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
