i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
