So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize