so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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