Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
i think we sleep fucked last night...
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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