don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize
