Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
