her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
