i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize