I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
try to milk me bitch
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