How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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