I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
