she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
