About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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