Kiss
Puke
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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