found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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