he referred to my room as the tit cave...
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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