Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
