Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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