Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
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