Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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