This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
