I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize