Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
